Should you expect the world?

My husband throughout his life has always prepared for failure. If he doesn’t get his hopes up then he won’t be so disappointed if he doesn’t get it. We couldn’t be more different on this front. When I prepare, I prepare for success. I literally pour my heart and soul in. If I’m unsuccessful yes it can be devastating but after lots of practice you learn to move on quickly to the next venture. I have failed in job applications, exams, friendships, love and life in general. But I have succeeded more times than I have lost.

In the words of Thomas Edison there really is no such thing as failure, only learning how not to do something. If you ‘fail’ 100 times you have really just learnt 100 ways not to do something.

My husband may have less disappointment in his life, but that can mean his victories aren’t quite as emotional. They are tarnished by anti disappointment methods. He reduces the suspense whereas I build mine up so that when I do finally succeed it’s a huge accomplishment.

So what is the right approach? There is no magical formula to protect ourself from disappointment or learning how not to do something. But I truly do believe that without knowing sadness you cannot experience true happiness. You have to accept the peaks and troughs. Protecting yourself all the time is denying yourself the right to actually live.

So I set my expectations high. My expectations of myself and of others. Yes this means I have further to fall but, when my hopes and dreams do come through, they’re pretty darn amazing.

Not everyone can live up to your hopes or expectations. So you do have to learn to let things go and to forgive, as I mentioned above, to a new venture. It can mean that I’m judged for expecting the best from people but that doesn’t make me a bad person or mean that I should be demoralised until my expectations are lowered.

One of my favourite quotes of all time comes from the film ‘Did you hear about the Morgan’s’. When trying to overcome divorce, our resident sex in the city gal, Sarah Jessica Parker, says that perhaps she needs to scale back her expectations, to not expect anything from him and for him to not expect from her to; make the marriage work. Just as she is about to accept a fate of low expectations and therefore a life without those highs and joys, a wise man (Sam Elliot one of my faves!) tells her:

‘you should expect everything from each other!’.


This quote really resonates with me. I am so passionate about making the people I love feel special and happy that I literally expect the world from myself to them. Of course I’m not perfect and I can royally screw up sometimes and also I can’t keep everyone ecstatically happy all of the time because there is only one of me. I also have arguments like other people and disagreements which detract from happiness from time to time. But the point is, my intention is there. Where I can and where I have the opportunity to make the people I love feel amazing I do.

In giving the world, do I expect it in return? Yes I do. Know that I don’t give the world to receive it, but as I am always preparing for the best and for success, I naturally expect and see the good in people. Unfortunately not everyone shares my passion. And as I mentioned about falling a long way before… If your expectations are high then your pain from the loss is even higher.

There are some things that you can’t just quickly move on from. My husband tells me that I should just stop expecting such high results and stop giving them so that I can’t get hurt. Just accept that’s the way it is and move on. You don’t have to give the world to them and they don’t to you. The problem is, I will never stop trying to give the world because it makes me happy to see others happy. It makes me happy to make someone smile, to create a happy tear, to give motivation, to empower, to push people to achieve, to push people to be the best they can be.

Not everyone wants the world from you. Some people would just rather a continent or a small island and they don’t want to give you the world. Sadly for me it’s all or nothing. I wish I could just give a piece of myself, to just be around from time to time and smile where necessary. But that’s not who I am and that’s who I will never be. Because the in between genuinely makes me miserable and depressed. Either you’re with me in my life through our individual ups and downs or you’re not. I was also not created just for the downs when you decide you want me, or for you to ride on the back of my ups. This is a mutual swapping of the earth here. 

Handing out planets on the corner.

XxX

Happy Places

Today I wanted to talk about Disney World. Why? No particular reason other than its a happy place to talk about and we should all have our happy places.


Every year my husband and I visit Disney World in Florida. It’s not cheap and it takes a year’s worth of saving, but when visiting a place is special to you then you do all you can to make it happen. 

To us Disney world is an escape. A break from the world we live in where all we see on the news is war and hate. This doesn’t mean we turn our back on the world of course. It simply means we take a moment away from it to just be ourselves.



Disney is often described as an escape from the ‘real world’. But when you think about it really, what is the real world? In our day to day lives we are fed media lies and unnecessary information about unnecessary things. Working in businesses, that if the world were to have an apocalypse, no one would care about. When we’re at Disney we are living in the present every moment. With each other with no external pressures and being who we truly are. We are not tied to a need to appear a certain way or act a certain way. We can just be who we are with fun, love and freedom.


It might not be everyone’s cup of tea but everyone has that one place that is special to them, where they can be themselves more than ever. And if you don’t have that place then find it. Maybe it’s a friend’s house. Maybe it’s even your own (if you can still let go of the pile of bills on the side). 


We’re always so excited to go back to our ‘real world’ where the clouds part and you can see the wood through the trees without any outside worries.

In fact, we decided to get engaged and married in our happy place where we could just truly be us. 


I’m so excited for 2017 where we get to visit my best friend’s happy place in Vegas to watch her get married and to visit Disneyland in California for the first time having new adventures and making memories.

To happy places all over the world

XxX 

Tower of Terror ride queue and EPCOT